Kungfuhobbit's Internet Laws
1. As debate on any topic continues over time, somebody will blame the bankers
2. As debate on any topic continues over time, somebody will slander Richard Dawkins
3. The first two-thirds of any debate is spent ad-homming and strawmanning before finally understanding each other’s points; the last third is spent coming to the realisation that intuitions are inexplicable and that people’s values are subjective, arbitrary and mutually irreconcilable
4. If you want to make a devastating philosophical critique of their argument, there’s an SMBC for it; if you want to make a trivial, pseudo-profound observation there’s a TED Talk for it.
5. If a phrase is attributed to Einstein, Gandhi or Russell on the internet, they didn’t say it.
6. In a democracy, on every political issue there’s a popular answer and it’s nearly always wrong.
7. If there's a change.org petition calling for it, don't do it
(The Petition Heuristic)
8. There is zero chance of getting people to respond to the content of your argument rather than its perceived emotional tone.
9. If you can’t talk about quantum physics while referring to a PDE, shut up
10. As debate on left-right politics continues over time, somebody will voice the sentiment "Everyone's equal! And if you can’t see it then you’re a subhuman piece of shit and I’m so much better than you!”
(The Law of left-wing, anti-Tory discourse)
11. Every nationality thinks they alone invented humour, war, compromise and cuisine.
12. The only certainties of life are conflict, competition, disagreement and gossip.
Three laws of discovery
1. Arnold’s law Discoveries are rarely attributed to the correct person
(Of course Arnold’s law is self-referential)
2. Berry’s law Nothing is ever discovered for the first time
(prompted by the observation that the sequence of antecedents under law 1 seems endless)
3. Whitehead’s law Everything of importance has been said before by someone
who did not discover it.